Twelve

 

On December 29, 2024, as I sat holding my sweet, new granddaughter, I opened my phone and saw this picture.

I immediately saw 6:12, which always reminds me of my daughter Abigail because her birthday is 6/12. Then I looked above the date and saw December 29, and thought, "Oh my word, is it really the end of DECEMBER?! I haven't even once thought about the pain of December!"

And then I looked down in my left arm, at my beautiful granddaughter, Abigail Noelle. What a circle of emotion and perspective.

Twelve.

In December 2012 I learned that my daughter Abigail would die.

In December 2024 my granddaughter Abigail was born.

Twelve is a good number. He has taught me a lot of things in 12 years, many of which lessons I wish I could more accurately recall. But I trust that they aren't just lessons that have become faded memories, but are lessons that have helped me become.

Now a new chapter of my life is being written, where distinctions get to be made of 'my Abigail' or 'Baby Abigail.' And quickly, the majority of references to Abigail will be of the one we see and hold, and not the one we remember and will someday see again.

I believe Decembers won't be hard anymore...this year I completely forgot the pain, and next year will be filled with anticipation of a 1-year-old birthday!

I testify that Christ lives. He died, and what a painful, agonizing experience that was for those who loved him. And yet He lives again, and that fact brings unparalleled joy and peace. The anticipation of reunions is undeniable, but I have life to live and more to become until that time.

The next 12 years will surely not turn out as I plan, but I trust my Father's plan more. I am SO grateful that in His plan, deep sorrow and intense pain can be turned to joy and rejoicing. I testify it can, through faith in Him and time.

As always, FAITH.